Shower Power

I have seen a recent comment made by Iren our Scandinavian commentator and sex advice columnist. Apparently she feels we men on the Diablog are perhaps not the romantic beings on Gods earth.

I was shocked to read what she thinks of some of the most romantic men on the planet.
Surely she can’t be referring to ER Smiles Glynsky, and possibly even myself?
Let me quote her advice.

‘I am also very aware of the fact that men thinks changing bed habits are the same as new pyjamas… Come on guys!…Step up the game a bit and surprise your wife before someone else does it. Most women secretly wants to be shocked, seen and appreciated and if you dont do it, she will find someone else to do it.’
Tomorrow you will probably be hung over but on Wednesday you should do something you haven’t done in a while.. . Follow her in the shower and make her feel special maybe :)’

Showering with other people can be highly dangerous….Look what can happen when Iren’s advice is followed too literally.

I am sorry to finish 2012 on such a scary note, but nevertheless I wish all Diablog readers writers and commentators, a peaceful and very happy new year.

plan ahead…

Dear diablog,

So we are just about to say goodbye to 2012!

In some respects it has been a fantastic year for me and for my wonderful hometown, London – Olympics, Paralympics, Queen’s Jubilee, Salon Prive, Goodwood and two, yes two, visits from Engine Room. Wow.

So, today it is farewell to 2012 and welcome to 2013.
Along with most people I salute the passed year with some sadness, some disappointment and some extasy whilst I shall greet the new with unbridled optimism.

You, dear reader, have stuck with us bravely and, thanks for that. Even through the joke bad music that we have dreamed up for you – and I commend Pete and Engine Room for putting up with my (deliberately) awful Christmas stuff!

It seems fitting that I sign off musically for this year with what is certainly my absolute favourite (in all senses) ‘modern’ song of the past two years. It is clever, stylistic, musically challenging with key and mood changes, well mastered and superbly delivered – all one could ever ask of a good pop song.

Thanks to my old friends a Vinyl Carvers I guess I am the only person in the world with a 7″ single of this (b/w Etta James ‘At Last’!!) and for that I shall always give thanks.

Love it, love it. Can’t stop playing it on the juke.

Yours, and wishing you long life, happiness and access to the sort of lovely people that I know

PS. At a New Year’s Eve party with ER tonight – who will make it out to the other side???!!!

i feel a right tit…

Dear diablog,

It would seem that Smiles


(how do like your image ol’ bean – to me its just you!) has decided to join the legions of ‘material providers’ of which I am very fortunate to have a number.

Most of his stuff is comedy, but some is just unprintable (funny but unprintable!).

He has recently, however sent me some worrying news, though my concern is mainly due to the violence of his reaction to the poor Mr. Rickson’s latest invention.

Whilst a) attempting to adhere to the ground rules laid down by the venerable Engine Room (no nekkid ladies!), b) hoping not to offend our female readers whom we really value and c) ensuring that G+P is up there where it belongs, I have to pass on what Smiles sent…

Continue reading “i feel a right tit…”

£1 fish man…

Dear diablog,

Even I cannot believe that I am writing this. For the benefit of Engine Room and Pete, this has nothing, repeat nothing to do with ‘Christmas Music’ as we have recently known it – it just happens to have taken place around Christmas time!

By way of a boring intro, Mme. and I lived through the payola years in British pop music. At the end of the day, like many other ‘scandals’ and ‘outrages’ which I am saving up for rants after Christmas, much of it is really no more than a load of  ‘Morality Queens’ (aka Engine Room and one or two others who I wont mention now) getting on their high horses about something that they feel all the rest of us should feel guilty about enjoying/earning a living from/talking about/getting on with life.

Enough of that for now. I want to know what has replaced payola and how does it work?

Plot (and a true story):

Honest reasonably hard working and almost as good looking as Glynsky, Pakistani guy (with more than just a passing resemblance to Signor Berlusconi!) arrives in UK with his family about 18 months ago and sets up a fish stall in a prospering local market in South London.

Wakes up one day and says to number one son ‘what we need is some real marketing’, so borrows a friend’s vc, writes a truly crap ‘song’ which, after filming, ends up as

Not exactly an Ivor Novello nomination number and the acting could have been a bit more up it’s arse and arty, but all things considered it’ll do.

Next morning he sticks it on youtube, tells all his mates whilst swigging a ‘Singa’ in the Slug and Lettuce and returns to Billingsgate to buy a mound of 50p fish for the stall.

For a very short while not a lot happens – till someone notices that his youtube hits have topped…

Continue reading “£1 fish man…”

who wants the drum stick…

Dear diablog,

We, that is Mme. Glynskette and I in particular, but no doubt joined by Pete and Engine Room wish you and yours a very
and hope that you spare a thought for the turkey leg
though, this time, it has nothing to do with him.
As you know Mme. a few weeks ago had a fall and one of her beautiful pins ended up looking like
Although she hasn’t yet quite returned to her usual self
she does a pretty good Star Wars Storm Trooper impression in her leg brace!
Happy Christmas to all our readers – may you receive all you desire and give more.
Yours, diablog, full of pud and port