Only in America?

Dear Reader,

In one of his comments here, our beloved commentator Smiles implied, that Americans are extra stupid. Or uneducated. So I would like to report from one of my recent visits to the UK.

Obviously you are able to surf the internet, how else would you be here? And on 363 days of the year I welcome each and everyone, who sets sail and embarks on the adventure of going online. Glynsky insists that I am patient. And maybe I am. But only on 363 days. And then there is this one day of the year. Last time it happened while I was in the UK. It started with the first person:

“Constantly I receive this kind of emails. Is there something we can do about this?”

Excuse me? What is wrong with receiving emails? What kind of emails are you referring to? Am I supposed to be a mind reader? How about showing one to me, you know, for clarity? And who is “we”? Unless you are talking pluralis majestatis, what will you be doing to solve the problem? Oh right, nothing. So why don’t you say so then?

Next up, same day, different person walks up to me:

“Can you connect me to the cloud?”

Already annoyed, I pointed up to the sky and replied: To which of these clouds would you like to be connected, and how? Lightning? So the person reached into her bag, pulls out an iPad and waves it in front of my face:

“No, this one needs connection to the cloud!”

Clearly, this person too had no clue what she was talking about. Stupidly she repeated words, not thinking, not using her brain at all. If you don’t bother to think about your question, why should I bother thinking about an answer? My reply: What is “the cloud”? was answered with:

“I need to go to that google thing”.

I cringed and said: So you want to get a WiFi connection to the internet? She looked at me like speaking Chinese. Running out of patience I took the pad, connected it to WiFi, opened the browser – another word she had not heard before – and loaded the google webpage. She did not even say thank you, when I handed it back to her.

And then the next patient complained:

“I cannot make phone calls, the phone says no simcard”

Oh really, if there is no simcard in it, how do you expect to make a call? Have you checked, whether or not there is a card in it? Oh, you don’t know, what a simcard is? Much less, where it is in your phone? Why the duck do you think you are entitled to use it then? Like usual, switching the phone off and on again solved that problem.

By then I felt like Clint:


And to Smiles I say: Ignorance and stupidity are universal.

Stay sane,

Engine Room

2 Replies to “Only in America?”

  1. I totally agree with you that stupidity is universal. I travel all over the world on business and worry every day about who is going to run our companies and even worse, our countries in the future.
    Hi from rainy Almaty. Here it is normal that young guys of 25 years, have their own companies and drive Porsche or Mercedes. In Europe, they are still studying after changing the course midway as they did not like it, and stating at Hotel Mama. I speak from experience, as I have one at home and he was horrified when I told him that after university and if he has a job, he will have to pay for his keep.
    The Druid and I remember our Mum waiting at the door on pay day at the end of the first week.

  2. With you on that Smiles. My mum ‘obtained a donation’ of 33% of all my teenage earnings. Took weeks to save up for a pair of shoes I passed each morning on the way to work.
    Mind you, the work was great – a real ’60’s record shop where I had memorised all the racks for immediate service to the punter.
    Did I enjoy it.

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