Philippa

The Porcelain Elephant

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

“Miss Whack, I’d like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday.”

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name.

The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it’s okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, “Sure. I have this,” and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she’ll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, “There’s a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral.” She holds up the tiny pink elephant. “I mean, what in the world is this?”

(You’re gonna love this.)
The bank manager looks back at her and says….

“It’s a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”
(You sang it, didn’t you? Yeah, I know you did.)

Never take life too seriously.

Philippa

Voters US Style

This video could well be one of the most contrived you will see, but it could also be nearer the truth than you would imagine. Check it out and be amused if it grabs you that way. Unfortunately I couldn’t get the actual video up here, so you need to open / copy paste the link.

https://safeshare.tv/x/fJuNgBkloFE

Philippa

Pfizer & Pepsi to Merge

This will no doubt put Coca Cola out of business in the near future…!

The Pfizer Corporation announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and this new product will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer.

It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one.
Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of cocktails, highballs and just a good old-fashioned stiff drink. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day…There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer’s research. This means that by 2025, there
should be a large elderly population with perky boobs, huge erections and
absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.